As I was sitting down at Willows beach the other Friday after a nice barefoot run over the logs and rocks with Viktor I was struck by the beauty of the spaces between the amazing things I was seeing.  There were thick puffy clouds with an amazing blue sky behind giving a stark difference between the two.  As the clouds changed and danced in the winds the line between them changed. Sometimes it ws real easy to see the line because it would be lit up with beautiful radiant gold sun light and sometimes it was more difficult to see as the line blurred.  It seemed as the darker the clouds got the more stark the line between the sky and clouds got.  As I turned my head and looked another direction there was a huge wide line of clouds where that must have gone on for miles.  The space between the clouds and the sky was beautifully glowing it looked as if the glowing was completely still for a long time.  I knew though that that space was ever changing that was where the life was, the energy.  Ebbing and flowing, never stagnet .  At that moment a seagull flew through my vision.  I saw bird, I saw air, I saw the air flowing over and around as the bird moved through it.  Like a boat moving through the water.  I wondered what the line between bird and air looked like, what it felt like.  Was it still and quiet or was it a spot of chaos of order?  As I looked I began to revisit conversations Blaise and I have had about polarities.  I looked at the clouds and saw large ominous objects that blocked the beautiful sun rays from my vision, it was also a bit chilly in the shade.  I looked at the beautiful blue sky feeding everything with the sunshine flowing through it.  I wanted the sun and blue sky.  I did not want the clouds and all the things that came with them.  Then a thought came to me.  If not for the clouds and the sky I would not know what the beautiful golden line between them looks like.  The beautiful brilliant golden line danced and changed as the clouds changed.  The bigger the difference between the 2 things (sky and clouds) the more radiant the line between them got.  When I got stuck looking at the thick clouds and feeling the chilly damp air I would become enveloped by the sensations of wishing for them not to be there.  Wishing for life to be different than it was, suffering.  When I got stuck looking at the beautiful blue sky I was filled with feelings of warmth and beauty, wishing for more of that.  Only to get taken away by the cloud that just moved into the path of the sunlight.  Don’t block my sun, I want the sun, not the clouds.  Oh please cloud go away.  As I watched the dance in the sky and listened to the dance of the voices in my head I truly saw where the beauty lies.  If I know the sky and I know the clouds that will show me where the line between them is.  That is where the magic is.  That is where the freedom is.  That is where I choose to create putting my focus.  I just flashed back to an experience when I was younger and learning how to drive.  My brother and I went out on an icy day to the high school parking lot.  Our mission on that cold day was to see how loose we could get the car and bring it back into line.  Or just plain do doughnuts.  So as we began driving and using all the space the parking lot afforded us by being out of control then in control I began to become accustomed to letting the car go and finding the perfect moment to snap it back into line.  Of course most of the time it would just spin around until it would stop on its own.  I can remember one time where the back end swung way out to the left then I countered with the wheel and it over corrected and swung way out to the right.  This replayed itself several times each time going way to the left then way to the right.  Then I corrected with the wheel at the right time with the right force and the car found the middle and began driving straight again.  Looking back on it now it was necessary for me to really see the car out of control on both sides before I could find the middle.  Maybe a mundane example.  Flash forward to now, sitting waiting for Romi to wake up drinking coffee.  The more I know what up is and the more I know what down is, the more I am able to see where the line between them is.  Getting stuck in my desire for either up or down creates me as the victom to the circumstance.  Riding in the space between up and down creates the freedom to move effortlessly between the 2 without attaching myself to either side.  FREEDOM.

As I bring this into a concrete vision I look at the gym now and what is happening.  The space has been filled with the most amazing healing moments since December.  Myself and the clients riding their own waves of creativity going as far as the limitations we all place on ourselves will allow.  The gym has had some amazing people visiting from Alberta and BC.  What a pleasure to be able to go into a space and co create everyday.  Over the past week things have mellowed.  Vickie left to rejoin her life in Nelson.  Greg created taking a week off.  Morgan just told me that she wishes to create coming in one day a week.  The creative energy still fills the moments with clients, there is just less time being spent doing that.  Add into the mix the month of July being littered with vacation time for Jason and I.  There ya go.  Another cycle, up/ down.  I trust in the fact that cycles come and go and the gym will soon enough be filled with people who all come here because they want to create their life and their healing, as I do my own.  So for now I will basque in the sunlight, relax, enjoy what client time there is, and prepare for my presentation in Regina next month.  I am excited to play with Jordan today, he turned 11 last Thursday and is doing some amazing things everyday.  Maybe Greg will decide to come in, maybe Jamie, maybe Dennis.  If someone shows up I will play otherwise I will create my videos for the power point.